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Le rôle du deuxième parent dans l'allaitement

The role of the second parent in breastfeeding

The role of the dad in breastfeeding — a topic rarely discussed…

Some dads (or second mums) throw themselves wholeheartedly into the breastfeeding journey, whilst others assume they have no role to play! 

"Dads can't be involved" — a misconception that is still far too common… And yet, fathers have every right to be at the heart of the breastfeeding experience. All that matters is their desire to be involved.

We explored the topic with Sophie, a childcare nurse trained in breastfeeding support. In this article, she shares her tips for helping dads get involved with confidence.

Contents

"The co-parent can't be involved" — a misconception that is still far too widespread… And yet, they have a full role to play at the heart of breastfeeding. All that matters is their desire to be involved.

We explored the topic with Sophie, a childcare nurse trained in breastfeeding.

Dans cet article, elle nous partage des astuces pour permettre au coparent de s'impliquer sereinement dans l'allaitement au quotidien

The co-parent

Pour trouver sa place avec l’allaitement, il est important de s’informer avant la naissance sur toutes les questions relatives à l’allaitement et de participer aux cours de préparation. 

How can you involve the second parent before the birth?

Communication within the couple is very important, as we all have our own ideas and beliefs about how breastfeeding should be managed.

It is essential for both partners to read up on the subject through articles, videos, books… to form their own opinion and not simply follow the advice (which is sometimes not very helpful) of those around them.

During antenatal classes, the expectant mother can also attend with the other parent, so that both receive informed guidance.

It is also an opportunity for them to connect with other expectant co-parents, share their concerns, and ask the questions that matter most to them.

The more informed the co-parent is, the more they will want to get involved and the better placed they will be to support the mother.

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What is the role of the second parent at birth?

Valoriser la maman

L’allaitement est une expérience d’apprentissage, surtout pour les nouvelles mamans.

Au départ, le couple est dans la découverte de leur bébé. Ils apprennent tous les 3 à se connaître, un nouveau rythme doit alors se mettre en place...

Mais, entre la fatigue et les variations hormonales, certaines mères se sentent particulièrement fragiles...

Saviez-vous que le baby-blues concerne 50 à 70 % des mères ? Retrouvez notre article sur le baby blues.

Rassurez-vous cette période dure généralement 3 jours. 

Au départ, la nouvelle maman a besoin de prendre confiance en elle. Elle a donc particulièrement besoin d'être rassurée et d'être encouragée par son conjoint.

Soutenir la mère

On ne se le cache pas, il y a des jours où l’allaitement sera plus difficile que d'autres... Le rôle du deuxième parent dans l'allaitement sera d'autant plus important.

Notamment lors des périodes de pics de croissance du bébé (le premier pic a lieu vers 3 semaines), ou lorsque les pleurs du soir s’intensifient…

Alors, un coparent présent et soutenant peut avoir un réel effet sur le bien-être de la maman.

De plus, la confiance d'une mère dans son partenaire est en corrélation avec sa confiance dans l'allaitement.

En effet, le coparent est aussi d'un important soutien et peut encourager à continuer à allaiter dans les moments difficiles !

Le soutien affectueux d’un partenaire est l’un des facteurs les plus importants dans la décision d’une femme d’allaiter son enfant.

D'ailleurs, une étude a conclu que les familles étaient plus influentes que les professionnels [1], [2] !

Did you know?

Le coparent peut donner la tasse, ce qui permet de prendre le relais avec l’allaitement et de participer activement. 

How can the co-parent bond with the baby?

One of the greatest fears of the co-parent is feeling left out if the mother is breastfeeding.

Yet there are many ways to bond with your baby other than bottle-feeding!

Here are a few…

Time for a feed?

The second parent can very easily help their partner find a comfortable breastfeeding position. They can then fetch the baby and help with positioning at the breast. They can also bring whatever the mother needs — a glass of water, a herbal tea… 

And if they feel like it, they can also keep the mother company during the feed, chat with her and with their baby...

This precious moment will help the mother to relax and also to stimulate the let-down reflex to bring the milk in.

Did you know that touch is one of the most powerful senses at birth? 

Yes, when a baby is placed skin-to-skin, it stimulates the release of a hormone: oxytocin.

It is known as the hormone of love and attachment.

And as you may have guessed, it is this hormone that helps forge a special bond between parents and their baby.

Baby massage also helps to release hormones on both sides!

Most parents find it a great source of pleasure. All the more so because this close contact helps you to better understand your baby.

This approach also helps to strengthen secure attachment bonds between the child and their parents. 

In fact, one study [3] demonstrated that baby massage significantly reduced the stress of the second parent and improved the bond between the co-parent and their child.

And yes, mutual trust is also strengthened, as is communication with the little one. 

Massaging your baby is a truly special moment of closeness to share!

Through babywearing, the second parent also builds a unique bond, and the connection that forms between them will be all the stronger for it. 

The co-parent can then regularly hold the baby in their arms, cuddle them and gently rock them.

The baby will then feel a sense of security, calm and wellbeing, which also strengthens mutual trust. 

What's more, the baby will discover their scent… which will help them realise that there is more than just mum.

And finally, the co-parent will also develop a sense of confidence with their baby.

It is through the small everyday interactions that the parent-child bond is built.

Nappy changes, bath time and everyday care are all wonderful opportunities to build a superb relationship with the baby and create a lovely bond.

And during these moments, communication with the baby is all the more important! It can take the form of eye contact, smiles, gentle touches, reassuring words…

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What are the alternatives to breastfeeding?

Le coparent souhaite prendre un peu le relais ?

Eh bien, il existe des solutions pour qu'il puisse lui aussi donner le lait au bébé, en cas d'allaitement mixte. Si vous utilisez un tire lait, il peut s'informer sur comment tirer son lait et vous aider. 

Parmi les plus intéressantes, on retrouve la tasse.

D'ailleurs, c'est la seule alternative au biberon ou des études ont été réalisées. L’alimentation à la tasse a un impact positif sur l’allaitement et aiderait à le préserver [4].

Cette alternative permet aussi d’éviter d’éventuels troubles de la succion, qui je précise peuvent arriver à tout âge ! Retrouvez notre article sur la confusion sein tétine.

Pour boire à la tasse, le bébé lape le lait comme un petit chat le ferait.

Votre choix est de faire un allaitement exclusif au sein ?

Alors, il va falloir attendre le début de diversification pour le coparent, soit aux alentours de 6 mois comme le préconise l'OMS.

Boosting your milk supply: The essential guide by an IBCLC

A complete ebook designed for all mothers who want to optimise their milk supply.
Clear your doubts, explore natural strategies and adopt effective practices for a peaceful breastfeeding journey.

The role of the second parent in breastfeeding

To conclude

The secret to building a wonderful relationship with your baby is of course to spend time with them.

Moreover, it allows both parents to gain greater confidence in their new role.

So, I can only encourage parents to give their child as much attention as possible.

For example, outside of care routines and feeds, you can play with them or sing songs...

In fact, it is all the small interactions that fully contribute to creating secure attachment bonds between the child and their parents.

By caring for the child, it also allows them to develop a trusting relationship with those around them.

So, have you learnt more about the co-parent's role in breastfeeding?

[1] Kessler LA, Gielen AC, Diener-West M, Paige DM. The effect of a woman’s significant other on her breastfeeding decision. J Hum Lact. 1995;11(2):103-9. 10.1177/089033449501100214    

[2] https://www.lllfrance.org/vous-informer/fonds-documentaire/dossiers-de-l-allaitement/1290-da-64-facteurs-influant-sur-decision-allaiter-en-public

[3] Cheng CD, Volk AA, Marini ZA. Supporting fathering through infant massage. J Perinat Educ. 2011;20(4):200-209. 10.1891/1058-1243.20.4.200 

[4] McKinney CM, Glass RP, Coffey P, Rue T, Vaughn MG, Cunningham M. Feeding Neonates by Cup: A Systematic Review of the Literature. Matern Child Health J. 2016 Aug;20(8):1620-33. 10.1007/s10995-016-1961-9    

Our recommended product

Moringa Mama

Moringa Mama

Moringa supplement for breastfeeding

£15.65

£17.38
Breastfeeding

Moringa at a dose of 350mg

Shatavari to help maintain a healthy breast milk flow

Without fenugreek or fennel

100% organic and vegan

Discover

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