Motherhood, a profound psychological upheaval

Pregnancy can give rise to heightened emotions and anxiety stemming from concerns directly related to the pregnancy. In 1956, the British psychoanalyst Winnicott used the term "primary maternal preoccupation" to describe this particular hypersensitivity that attunes the expectant mother to her child's needs after birth. Women may also experience feelings of strangeness or a sense of unreality about their situation.

The challenges associated with motherhood are still not well understood by society. They hint at the possibility that maternal love may not always be unconditional. That said, it is important to acknowledge that this period is not always easy, and that it is possible to seek support in facing these difficulties. Health professionals can help you (midwife, GP, doula, psychologist, paediatrician, nursery nurse...). 

It is perfectly normal and valid to feel stressed or anxious; you are becoming a mother at the same moment your baby comes into the world. 

 "Childbirth is an act, an experience, an event that is as much physical as it is psychological." 

(PRIEUR-RICHARD E., « Une odyssée inconsciente, l'accouchement » in Psychismes Vivants, Septembre 2010, p.6 ). It is marked by an intensity unlike any other. 

While pregnancy comes to an end with the birth of the child, birth itself is a transition that marks the continuation of the journey into motherhood. Today, women are often very well supported during pregnancy, but far less so during the postpartum period — yet childbirth brings about a somatic and psychological upheaval of great intensity. 

The maternal body, which had adapted and transformed in order to carry, nourish, oxygenate, and protect, will now move towards a new equilibrium. This postnatal change is, moreover, little understood and often confused with a "return to the pre-pregnancy body".

Furthermore, when childbirth is experienced as deeply painful, it can shake a woman's sense of self, leaving her feeling damaged in her feminine identity. It is therefore important that you are able to take care of your body. Rest, eat a balanced diet, and let yourself be pampered. Arrange a moment of relaxation for yourself (massage, energy treatments, acupuncture, hairdresser, beauty treatments). If your partner is able to take paternity leave from the moment you return home, don't hesitate to make the most of it. Together, things are so much easier to bear! If you have the possibility, ask those around you to take over some everyday tasks. You'll find that they'll be delighted to be able to get involved (preparing meals, ironing, housework…). 

In more than half of all cases, in the ten days following birth, the new mother experiences a profound emotional lability known as postpartum blues or baby blues. Her state alternates between bouts of tears linked to depressive feelings and elevated mood. She faces a process of grief: the sense of fullness tied to her pregnancy gives way to a feeling of inner emptiness. The real child displaces the imaginary child she had envisioned.

What is more, she must face her new responsibilities as a mother towards a child who is now the centre of everyone's attention. Irritability and insomnia can also be significant. Confusion, difficulty concentrating and memory difficulties may accompany the mood fluctuations. These manifestations are known as postpartum blues; they are transient and benign. If they persist, do not hesitate to consult a psychologist. Asking for help does not make you a bad mother — quite the contrary: recognising your limits is a strength. Taking time for yourself is important! 

The more you take care of yourself, the more your baby will feel it and be soothed in turn.